The latest. The greatest. The buttkicker's buttkicker.

		Failed physicist. Dismissed from 'Manhattan Project' for advocating splitting atom with headbutt. Last seen babe-hunting on Bikini Atoll.

			Fierce African chieftain. United 100 tribes under his leadership. Shrinking heads way before Duke.

		Imperious French General. Conquered half the world. Court-martialled for excessive taunting.

			Austrian composer known for his military marching music and his 324 illegitimate children.

		The great Russian leader. Bathed in vodka. Invented cossack dancing. Wrestled bears.

			Italian explorer. Found America before Columbus. Too busy buffalo wrestling to get the publicity.

		Helmets. Beer. Swords. Pillaging. Just like your average Nukem vacation.

			Middle-Eastern warrior. All Barbarian. All Nukem.

		Indian mystic -- peace-loving wiseman...till he got a few beers in him and then he was a maniac.

			Christian Martyr -- thrown to the lions. Ate the lions.

		Roman Emperor who divided his time between partying and conquering. Invented the combat toga.

			Greek philosopher. Proposed theory relating righteous buttkicking and pure contentment. Killed Aristotle.

		Have club, will travel. Simple, strong, primitive. The first Nukem.